Dear Alf #13

They say the only dumb question is the one that doesn’t get asked. Well, I beg to differ. The dumb question is the one that gets asked OVER AND OVER AGAIN! So, before you write, check our list of Most Frequently Asked Questions.

Q:  Hi Alf! Yes I love you, you are my fav char on Oddworld. I would do everything for you, you look so good…. 🙂 that’s enough sliming. I think almost every fan does slimings. everywhere you see it, on the forums if you’ve posted a pict at the forums (although if it really looks bad) they say you that it’s a great pict and stuff. But I hate slimings. The people who slime all time don’t tell you the truth. I think those peps are false. I dunno but If you posted a pict or show someone a pict, doesn’t everyone just tell you it’s good?

Ok but I didn’t mail you just to say this. (Sorry that I waste your time) here’s my question: In AO when Abe crashes down the cliff, Big face comes and draws this sideways 8 (the symbol for eternity) on the ground.Then later when Abe uses his power the first time some birds fly in front them and the form an 8. So has the 8 some meaning or something?

Bye, LA

P.S. If some sentence sounds bad, evil ,arrogant or something, sorry but my language is really bad and I never learn vocabulary. So sorry for that.

P.S. 2: Please ask Lorne if he can put the sliming topic, or any other things like this in the games, there are more topics that he could use but It’s so complicated to explain…

Alf:  You didn’t like my picture?

Q: Dear Alf,   The original 2 games produced by your company were marvelous works of infamthomable art. I studyed every peice of information I could find. I memorized the history of Oddworld. I completed both games with a perfect score after practice. I absorbed every faset of the concept and every nich. I downloaded every film and watched them over and over again. I am an artist and nothing in the past connected to me that way. It shifted my entire approch.

I watched with starving eyes every drawing and every detail that was released on Munch’s Oddysee as they were put up. I was a fanatical with the concept and story of Oddworld. Now I feel sick. The one company and the one artistic vision that stood out and built me up with longing for more let me down. Now Oddworld has stooped to the level Ninja Turtels or lower. Sam, the thing I most anticipated, is no longer a part of the game.

And Sobe. Why SoBe? This advertizement has destroyed the integrity of Oddworld. They are no long real torchered, heroic, and pathetic entitys through the minds eye. They are now simply a cheap video game. This act has destroyed Oddworld. You people built up my hopes and obliterated them.

Alf, I have found every flaw in Oddworld but it didn’t matter before. You said what are humans once. Now you are aware of a beverage created by them? How is that possible? Why the let down? I still do not bealive at this time that Lorne Lanning supported this. If he did let me know and I will leave silently with the upmost regrets of the time I spent.

Thank you Alf for your time. I don’t intend to insult. 

Alf:  Sobe liked the message of our content and very much liked the quirky humor and irony of our universe. The vendos appeared in the game as an exchange for the opportunity to be a part of the sneak peak Sobe / Xbox road show that gave the public an early opportunity to put Munch and the Xbox in their hands.

Whenever a co-promotional opportunity arises, Oddworld’s first order of business is to see if there are any outstanding labor or environmental issues with the potential co-sponsor. Not only did Sobe come up clean in our search, but they have also demonstrated historic efforts to try to raise the nutritious quality of the average mass market soft drink.

Q:  For the last 2 years we have been faithful Oddies. To my dismaze, we’re now on the floor in a fetal position. HELP! When is the next oddgame going to be released? BY CHRISTMAS 2001??? 

Alf:  Get off the floor and go outside! You should see “Power Ups to the People” posters everywhere! Huge signs that say “Oddworld: Munch’s Oddysee coming out on Nov. 15th” or “March 2001 in Europe”. Where have you been? Get up and take a deep breathe, Oddworld Needs You!

Q:   Hey, guys at Oddworld Inhabitants! I have been so jittery about Munch’s Oddysee. First off, let me say that I have wrote to you many times before. You already know that I am a HUGE and I mean HUGE Oddworld fan! Absolutely love the games and everything about them and in them.

I just downloaded the new Munch trailer, you know, the one in the beginning where a Mudokon farts and Abe says, “Dude, that’s nasty.” LOL. That trailer was hilarious and Slig-kickin’ AWESOME all at once! Just seeing everything alive and moving in the new 3D world has made me unable to wait for Munch’s Oddysee!

45 days left until Xbox and, the best part of all…ODDWORLD!!! YEAH!!!

On that Thursday, this is my plan:

1. Stay home from school and beat both Oddworlds again

2. Go to Best Buy at 10:00pm and wait in the Xbox line

3. While waiting, practice running very fast and stretching my arms as far as they will go

4. At 12:00am, when the doors open, rush into the videogame, or should I say Xbox section and grab and Xbox, Oddworld, Halo, and Dead or Alive 3 and pay for it

5. Get out of that unleashed hell and thank Odd that I am out alive and in one piece, and rush back home

6. Then, last of all, hook up the Xbox and play Oddworld all night and into the next day.

That is a very tight and risky schedule but hey, in the end it’s all worth it. I just really want to say the games you guys have created have been the BEST! I am just so excited about Oddworld, and I think I’m too excited. I’m acting like it is going to come out tomorrow but, NO, not until Nov. 15th! AAAHHHHHHH! Oh well, it will be here soon enough, although it may not seem like it.

I’m sure that you guys are just about as excited as the fans and I are. Or maybe you have been working to death on the game so much that when you are told, “Hey, our game that we have been working on for the last year is out!” you say, “Get me the hell away from that game!” LOL. But I bet you will definitely be proud of yourselves because you all should.

I now, finally, see why you switched to Xbox. All the screen shots I first saw were early in the game and weren’t even in motion. Now that I have seen it in its final stages and in motion, it looks better and badder than ever! And there are tons of questions I have for you but I would have to put them each on one e-mail.

I guess I should just wait till the game comes out to answer them because there are so many and because you guys are very busy. But if you want to send me anything about it being okay and that you would like to read my questions, just e-mail me about it. My e-mail address is at the top and I know that if you do e-mail me, you might not for a while because you are very busy.

Take your time on the game, it is more important than my e-mail. I will talk to you guys again soon and I just can’t wait!

11.15.01.

11.15.01.

11.15.01.

You guys are the coolest! Keep up the good work and you, you stay Odd as well. Goodbye! 

Alf: Ever consider switching to Decaf?

Q:   I would just like to let you know that after seeing the SoBe BEVERAGES dispenser in a screen shot for Munch’s Oddysee I have gone and bought many many SoBe products and drink them all the time (as a matter of fact I am drinking a SoBe Energy right now… it’s giving me the energy to write this email!!). And now my question… in Munch’s Oddysee do Munch and Abe get healed by drinking SoBe from the vending machines? and if so is it because SoBe is full of herbs, vitamins, and other good things that are healthy for Oddworld Inhabitants?

Alf:  Ya know Brew is bad so I stay away from anything in a bottle these days but good for you!

Q:   How do I get a msg to your whole staff to say that I am deeply impressed with the composition and hard work and everything you have put into this game. Just by wiewing the homepage I am chocked with the truth of the story behind and around the game. I would just like to say that I think this is really good. Congratulations and thank you for a great game.

Alf:   Gee Whiz, thank YOU!

Q:   I was looking at some pictures of the new Munch’s Oddysee game and I saw a picture of some weird new Mudokon with fish fins on his head, arms, and legs. I want to know, what kind of Mudokon is these guy and what is his abilities? I also saw a picture of a bunch of weird looking one-eyed, one foot sheep creatures, what are they and what are their abilities? 

Alf:  That Mudokon with the so-called fish fins is the Shaman. He guides you through the game giving you clues. Sometimes he’s a real pain, but ya gotta listen to him.

The one-eyed creature is called a Meep.

Q:   Hey Alf, i just went to vykkerslabs.com and it showed some pictures of purple hairless fuzzles while others are cover with brown hair. What’s up with that? 

Alf:  Those hairless creatures are Fuzzles, or what use to be Fuzzles before the Vykkers Scientists did their twisted experiments on them.

Q:   Because my sister (Cindy) is such a big odd fan I am infected with the disease too. And so I want to know, Why is Elum so cranky, stubborn, selfish and smells like a burst sewer pipe??? So why is he SO STUPID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And Alf your the sweetest!!! . 

Alf:  Gee, thanks! Elum got the looks but not the brains. Elums aren’t smart enough to bathe. They lack the ability to “think” reasonably gives them headaches. But Elums are cute and as you and your sister are living proof, chicks dig Elum.

Q: Hey, I’ve been a fan of the Oddworld series since the initial release of the first game. I’ve proselytized far and wide about the virtues to both Abe games. When Munch jumped ship to Xbox from PS2, while saddened that I would have to wait longer for the next game in the quintology, I remained steadfast in my belief that whatever was done would be for the benefit of the game and would only make the final product better.

Lately though, I have been getting progressively more worried. The final straw, as it were, was the inclusion of Munch as a visualization in Windows Media Player and the shameless plug for Microsoft Plus on the Oddworld website. With so many blatant Microsoft-appeasing actions of this type appearing in connection with Oddworld, I have finally had to acknowledge Oddworld Inhabitants as an unabashed sellout.

So my question comes down to this: How can Oddworld Inhabitants justify to me, one of their die-hard fans, their sellout? This isn’t a PS2 vs. Xbox issue. This is a monopoly issue. This is about becoming that which the games themselves regard as the ultimate evil. The Oddworld games are fundamentally built around anti-corporate ideals. Abe, Munch, and their brethren represent the little people who are crushed under the vast corporate machine. How can you, Oddworld Inhabitants, expect us to feel compassion and connection to the travails of these characters when you yourselves have become part of that terrible corporate machine? I appreciate the need for development moolah. I’m not stupid. I work in the CG world as well. It’s cutthroat out there, especially now. But you seem to have been doing fine when you were your own company. You cited better equipment as your reason for switching to Xbox, not a massive Microsoft bribe. How can you be such blatant hypocrites?

I really want an answer to this. And I don’t want any corporate rhetoric either. I want a real answer as to why I should accept the anti-corporate message of the Oddworld games even though the makers themselves are Glukkons.

With waning hope, –Coby

Alf:  Oddworld ain’t anti-corporate, first of all. Oddworld’s a business, and just like any other, to make our product, we rely on people buying them and then we use that money to pay the scrubs in the pens to crank out code and art and design. When we were asked to be part of the Plus! visualization we were excited that millions of people would be able to enjoy Munch too. Aren’t Sony and Nintendo big corporations too?

Q:   Hello!!! (ugh….what a “eccentric” way to begin….)…well…what can we write in a first letter to a Mudokon…….. Ok, I already know! How you could easily see, my nickname it’s a little odd (maybe not for ya), was something “inspired” in Abe’s Oddysee……but wasn’t to talk ’bout my name that I writte for ya! I writte just for freak, yeah!!! (just kidding….) I’m talking/writting from Brazil (do you know where is it???) and, let me to warn you that my English isn’t sooo good, coz I’m still learning, and I know you are a nice guy and WILL understand my situation, right?

Sadly, here there’s not so many fans of Abe (don’t you think he’s cute?? Like we say in my language: Tao fofinho!!!!!! Or inJapanese too: Kawaii!!!!!). Hey?? Why Abe himself doesn’t answeres at least the praises sometimes????? If Crig can, Abe can too!

What do you think ’bout teach me some interesting words (or even badwords, he, he….) in….hmmm….your idiom has a special name in English??? Oh, ok, in your language?? I can teach you some words too, if you prefer to exchange….(……..what stupid subject, hum………….).

But, my dear Alf….explaine more about the Mudokon’s reproduction, more scientific things, understand? I promise I’ll try to make a good Fan Art, Ok? Lemme ask ya something: do you know what is a woman?? I guess…..like….I finish here. (this mail was just to bother you a little, he, he!)

So………..Tchau!!! (good bye) Kudanchee!!!!

Alf:  I need a vacation.